Daily Archives: May 9, 2004

LYNCHBURG, Va. (AP) — President Bush’s chief political adviser, Karl Rove, counseled graduates of the Rev. Jerry Falwell’s Liberty University on Saturday to ignore the cynics and judge leaders by their character.

America, he said, needs people who have “the moral clarity and courage to do what’s right, regardless of consequence, fashion or fad.”

In other words someone who isn’t part of the current administration.

“These things can’t be taught in a government textbook … or the editorial page of The New York Times. You either have values ingrained in your heart and soul that will not change with the wind or you don’t,” Rove said.

Cue Bette Midler for a chorus of Wind Beneath My Wings

Rove reminded the 2,041 graduates to pay off their credit cards. He advised them that when they go to job interviews, “don’t act like you’re smarter than the person you’re interviewing with. Even if you are.”

Lucky for Rove, George W. Bush is stupid.

Everyone, he said, should find a career they truly love. He shared a tale of how he persevered in politics from an early age.

“As long as I can remember, I’ve always loved politics,” Rove said. “At the age of 9 I put a Nixon bumper sticker on the wire basket in the front of my bicycle. Unfortunately the little Catholic girl down the street was a couple years and about 20 pounds on me. She was for Kennedy.

“When she saw me on my bike with my bumper sticker for Nixon, she put me on the ground, flattened me out and gave me a bloody nose,” he said.

“Despite that beating I never lost interest in politics.”

And where is that girl today? Guarding “enemy combattants” in Iraq perchance?

Rove, who said he never earned a college degree, was presented an honorary doctorate of humanities by Falwell for his “commitment to conservative ideas.”

“Conservative ideas” apparently only being worthy of a High School Equivalency Diploma.

Liberty University is a private school affiliated with Falwell’s Baptist ministry.

See? What did I just say?

The graduates were greeted Saturday by about 40 supporters of Democratic presidential candidate John Kerry.

Infidels! Don’t they know their country needs them? Don’t they know their President was chosen by God?

Don’t they know that Midge Decter has a book to sell?