Fait Divers: “This is Not a Turkey”

The First Lesbian Speaks!

“The decision to become pregnant and raise a child with her female partner was not political, Mary Cheney, a daughter of Vice President Dick Cheney, told a Barnard College audience.”

Prior to informing them that the moon is made of green cheese.

“This is a baby,” Cheney said Wednesday at a forum sponsored by Glamour magazine. “This is a blessing from God. It is not a political statement. It is not a prop to be used in a debate by people on either side of an issue. It is my child.”


Well Mary, This is a turkey baster, and I’m sure you and Heather knew just what to do with it

Cheney, 37, announced in December that she and her partner of 15 years, Heather Poe, were starting a family. She did not say how the child was conceived. The baby is due in the spring and will be the vice president’s sixth grandchild.

Where you got the sperm is as mysterious as the identity of the “birth father” of that other sapphic adept.

“Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” right Mary?

Dick Cheney became testy last week when CNN’s Wolf Blitzer asked him what he thought of conservatives who are critical of his daughter’s pregnancy. Cheney told Blitzer he was “over the line.”
In a brief interview with The New York Times after Wednesday’s panel, Mary Cheney said she agreed that Blitzer had crossed a line. “He was trying to get a rise out of my father,” she said.

Unlike James Dobson I suppose.

Glamour editor Cindi Leive asked Cheney during the panel discussion if she had anything to say to conservatives such as James Dobson, founder of Focus on the Family, who have criticized her pregnancy, asserting that children should be raised by heterosexual married couples.
She responded, “Every piece of remotely responsible research that has been done in the last 20 years on this issue has shown there is no difference between children who are raised by same-sex parents and children who are raised by opposite-sex parents. What matters is that children are being raised in a stable, loving environment.”

In other words, Mary bunted.

Lesbian softball teams take note.

Cheney was an aide to her father during the 2004 campaign and now is vice president for consumer advocacy at AOL.

And prior to that she was a shill for Coors — doing her damndest to sell that piss-poor brew to the gays and lesbians who had rejected it for close to a decade due to the company owner’s support of anti-gay causes. Little Mary even attended a Mr. Leather America contest — to no avail.

She is the author of “Now It’s My Turn: a Daughter’s Chronicle of Political Life,” published last year.

And land-fill this year.

All Together Now!

“It’s turkey lurkey time
Tom turkey ran away, but he just came home
It’s turkey lurkey time
He’s really home to stay, never one to roam
Let’s make a wish, and may all our wishes come true…….
A snowy, blowy christmas, a mistletoey christmas
A turkey lurkey christmas to you…
A turkey lurkey christmas to you
It’s loosey goosey time
She was a gadabout, but she’s back again
It’s loosey goosey time
Her time is running out, and we all know when
Let’s make a wish, and may all our wishes come true….
A snowy, blowy christmas, a mistletoey christmas
A loosey goosey christmas to you…
A loosey goosey christmas to you
Turkey lurkey, loosey goosey
Some for uncle joe, some for cousin lucy
Everybody gather round the table
Dig in, dinner is being served
Eat all the turkey you are able
Can’t you see a partridge in a pear tree?
Climb up and bring it down for me
That’s something i would like to see
A snowy, blowy christmas, a mistletoey christmas
A turkey lurkey christmas to you……”

(a tad early, but what the hell.)

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