Daily Archives: December 24, 2010

Gizmo

Depressing ain’t it, Gizmo?

Well that’s why our wise Pagan forebears created Winter Solstice

“The winter solstice occurs exactly when the Earth’s axial tilt is farthest away from the sun at its maximum of 23° 26′. Though the winter solstice lasts only a moment in time, the term is also a turning point to midwinter or the first day of winter to refer to the day on which it occurs. More evident to those in high latitudes, this occurs on the shortest day and longest night, when the sun’s daily maximum position in the sky is the lowest.
The seasonal significance of the winter solstice is in the reversal of the gradual lengthening of nights and shortening of days. Depending on the shift of the calendar, the winter solstice occurs on December 21 or 22 each year in the Northern Hemisphere, and June 20 or 21 in the Southern Hemisphere. The 2010 winter solstice (summer solstice in the southern hemisphere) occurred on December 21, at 23:38 UTC. This is 11:38 pm Western European Time (WET) or 6:38 pm Eastern Standard Time (EST).
Worldwide, interpretation of the event has varied from culture to culture, but most cultures have held a recognition of rebirth, involving holidays, festivals, gatherings, rituals or other celebrations around that time.”

And such celebrations were created because of Season Affect Disorder – which can be might depressing. Right guys?

And that ain’t the half of it. Right Deanna?

That of course is from Christmas Holiday. Co-starring Gene Kelly. Sound cherry doesn’t it? Well it’s based on a story by Somerset Maugham (Of Human Bondage) adapted by Herman J. Mankiewicz (Citizen Kane) and directed by Robert Siodmak, who that same year helmed Phantom Lady and Cobra Woman !

A tad less gaudy, Christmas Holiday is set in New Orleans where a soldier on a stopover is directed to a “Roadhouse” (ie. whorehouse) where he discovers Deanna singing the above-embedded tune. Chatting with her afterward he hears her story — in flashback. Years before she’d fallen in love with a seemingly nice young man as interested in Wagner as she was at the time. They marry and to her horror learns he’s a mother-fixated (read, GAY) homicidal maniac. Returning to the present she discovers that ex-hubster is stalking her with an intent to kill. But the cops close in and shot down in ahil of bullets he dies in her arms as the last strains of Tristan und Isolde fill the soundtrack.

Talk about “Merry Christmas”!

Of course the holiday need not be quite so dire as the ever-fabulous David Sedaris reminds us.

DS

Back to the Wiki —

“Christmas or Christ’s Mass is one of the most popular Christian celebrations as well as one of the most globally recognized mid-winter celebrations in the Northern hemisphere. Christmas is the celebration of the birth of Jesus Christ, believed to be the Son of God, the second entity of the Trinity, according to the Christian tradition. The birth is observed on December 25, which was the Roman winter solstice upon establishment of the Julian Calendar. See Christian Nativity. Universal activities include feasting, Midnight Masses and singing Christmas carols about the Nativity. Good deeds and gift giving in the tradition of St. Nicholas or Santa Claus is also observed. Many observe the holiday for twelve days leading up to the Epiphany.”

According to historians the actual Jesus (we’re saying he existed for the sake of argument) was likely born sometime in July. But the Church has never let the truth get in the way of its pimping. Most recently its’s claimed that the Virgin Mary has appeared in Wisconsin.

Neat, huh? Not only cover the pedophile scandals but a kick in the cojones that state’s support of same-sex marriage.

Well enough with the Catholics!

Needless to say there are some Jews who sound a lot like Mel Gibson

And then (as if that weren’t enough) there are the Zombies!

Help me Bing!

Help me Seinfeld !

Help me Gay Men’s Chorus of London!

But most important of all, Help Me Darlene Love!