Oh Frank. Were you still around to witness THIS!
“Tell the Republicans on the House Appropriations Committee: “Pizza is not a vegetable”
You may think you’re reading The Onion right now, but you’re not. House Republicans are now defending the assertion that pizza is in fact, a vegetable. Here’s the lowdown, care of Think Progress:
Earlier this year, the USDA made an attempt to bolster the nutrition guidelines for the federal school lunch program. Under the new guidelines, for instance, school lunches would be limited to one cup of starchy vegetables a week and the ability of schools to count tomato sauce on pizza towards their fruit and vegetables requirement would be scaled back. But House Republicans, in a new spending plan unveiled yesterday, have done away with those changes:
The spending bill also would allow tomato paste on pizzas to be counted as a vegetable, as it is now. The department’s proposed guidelines would have attempted to prevent that.
The changes had been requested by food companies that produce frozen pizzas, the salt industry and potato growers. Some conservatives in Congress have called the push for healthier foods an overreach, saying the government shouldn’t be telling children what to eat.
Do we really have to explain just how asinine and offensive this is?”
“Asinine” and “offensive” are synonyms for “Republican.”
“It’s basically a version 2.0 of the early 80’s Republican assertion that ketchup was a vegetable (really, they claimed that).
First of all, if you want to get really geeky, tomato paste (the alleged vegetable component) is made from a tomato, which is actually a fruit, not a vegetable. But hey, even leaving that geeky (and frankly irritating) point aside, arguing that pizza sauce is a vegetable because it contains tomatoes is like arguing that a deep-fried Twinkie counts as “dairy” because of the cream filling, or that beer is a grain. “
Elvis, a registered Republican, would have approved.
He would also have LOVED —
— to Death.
“Look, pizza is great, and pizza is delicious. And if you add vegetables to pizza, hey, that’s awesome. But arguing that pizza sauce itself is a substitute for broccoli or carrots is just absurd. And at a time when childhood obesity is at record levels, the idea of pushing back on healthier food due to pressure from corporate interests is downright offensive.
Take action now. Tell the House Republicans that pizza is not a vegetable.”
Take it away boys! (Jimmy Carl Black is the Indian of the group)